Once more unto the breach…

100 year old Farm Sink, Butcher Block, Picture

Window and Sky Light...washing dishes was

almost fun...

The boys just returned from a harrowing journey trudging through mountains of the remains of the last renters at our house in Sussex. Our move to the city was necessary for so many reasons but we had the complication of a partially remodeled home in the country. Due to the cancer treatment which prohibits me from being near any chemicals and the fact that the neurological disease I was dealing with made it impossible for me to be near any loud noises like hammering, we had to stop the remodel when I became ill. Our only option was to move first and finish the remodel afterward which left us in the precarious position of having two housing payments for nearly a year, not something easy for anyone.

After an absolutely beautiful remodel by my husband and our son following my carefully laid design, our house was ready to rent. It sported brand new wood flooring, 60" wainscoting, a vaulted wooden ceiling in the kitchen with a sky light which allows morning light to filter in through the many trees on the property and a huge picture window which looks out to an open yard area surround by a forest, butcher block cabinet tops, a 36" commercial gas stove and a 100 year old dairy sink which was reconditioned along with a 4' old-fashion claw-foot soaking tub in the 'girls' bathroom. It was stunning.

Antique 4 Foot Claw-Foot Deep Soaking Tub...

You can only imagine our horror to arrive at the house after our renters took off without paying for three months of rent due only days before we were going to have to call in help to remove them and finding a house full of trash, old furniture and many, well, how do we say 'odd' things. It took a 15' U-Haul truck and our trailer packed so full that Josh had to leave the boys at the house cleaning to take it to the dump because there was so much it flowed into the cab and there was no room to take help to unload it all. It is hard to even go into to all the things we found missing and wrong in the house from the floors being destroyed which we will have to refinish, the wainscoting being carved into, the heating registers being moved, the stove being broken and our working air conditioners being spread throughout the yard in a thousand pieces. We still can't figure that one out. It was a nightmare. The good news is we can manage most of the repairs on our own. They also left without filling the fuel or propane tanks which means we are out those very expensive items. Any deposits were used up months ago so we have learned some very valuable lessons through this disastrous ordeal.

Picture window with customized cabinets, just my size...

God protected the main portion of our investment and with a little blood, sweat and tears, we will recover the house to its original condition. We will have to proceed with legal action to recover our money because we simply can't afford to be out this level of income but we are believing God will restore to us what is rightfully ours. We would rather not go this route but the house is a business now and we have to treat it as such. Josh and I are trying to help Benjamin detach a little since he put in so much work there and the wood working is mostly because of Benjamin's talent of being able to see the cuts and know how to make things look so nice. Josh stepped back and let him go when we saw the wood crafter begin to emerge in our son. He even confided to his sister once, it wasn't really work when he got to work with wood so the damage to his investment was hard for him to bear…not to mention, this weekend was his birthday.

Taddington and Me holding down the Fort...

Our pastor's sermon last week was timely, as only God can do. Sometimes we look at things that are hard and say, 'God can't be in this', yet, how often do we see the saints of old having things 'easy'. I've been reading a book, 'Broken Dreams, Shattered Lives' by Dan Hurst which has had a strong impact on me. In one section it talks about making decisions out of fear. When we rented the house the first time we made the decision of the renters out of fear and, if I am honest, didn't look at everything as closely as would have been wise. All the background and credit checks cleared but there were other issues that, if we had not been operating in fear, we would have probably realized and made a different decision that would have saved us money, time and a great deal of work. Operating and making decisions in fear will always lead you to a wrong decision.

Looking back at my life as a child, I was raised in a household of fear. There was fear over leaving the house, fear over answering the front door, fear over someone who sneezed in the car, fear over shaking hands, fear over people in general and it hampered our lives and our family's ministry. When I grew-up and started a home of my own, I took this fear with me. I was blessed to have a husband who didn't fear and began to slowly work me out of some of my issues and then, slowly, God has even recently been dealing with some of the deeper roots of those fears, tearing them out and replacing them with truth.

My Precious Husband...

I can't say I will never operating in fear again but I can say from now on, I will recognize it and be able to bring it under the blood before it overtakes me. I can say that as I study the Bible and glean from those Words I will learn to rest more and more in the arms of our Father and less and less in the circumstances. As the old song goes, 'Many things about tomorrow I don't seem to understand, but I know who hold tomorrow and I know who holds my hand'. I may still be in pain tomorrow, we may still be struggling to build our business tomorrow, our dreams may not be realized tomorrow and I may still be unable to walk tomorrow but I know God will be there to lead and guild us in His path for our lives and in that, there is no fear, there is only rest in Him.

May God Bless and Keep You in His Grace,
Lynne